free2beme,
I've been thinking and reflecting on your post for the last few hours. As a jw I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia. These illnesses were real. They were frustrating and debilitating. And it made matters worse to have people point the finger and make me feel that it was "all in my head." What I needed then more than anything was unconditional love and acceptance of what I was feeling.
Within a few years of my diagnosis I had a lightbulb moment where I realized that there was more to my illness than just a compromised immune system or some virus. I realized that there was indeed some emotional basis to my physical symptoms. But I couldn't see that until I was ready to see it. And no one could've made me see it, although if someone had opened up a safe space for me to express what I was going through, it would've made it easier.
Confronting the emotional baggage that causes dis-ease of any sort is not easy. cheezy made reference to the effects of cognitive dissonance, which is very valid here. It takes great courage to look at your life and realize that things may not be as you have long believed them to be. For lack of a better phrase, it's a complete mindf*$k to see that you have allowed yourself to be abused, deceived, taken. If you have the resources in place to support you, that realization can be freeing, albeit still difficult to process. If the resources are not in place, that realization is a shock to your brain and body and can play havoc on your health.
I think the most important thing for your sister is to have a support system in place. I think a firm medical diagnosis is a good place to start. It will allay her basic fears that the worse is happening to her health. Next, she needs some kind of treatment. Meds and some form of therapy are usually the most helpful in cases like these. The challenge though is helping her see that therapy could be useful. For me, I did the meds first and then when I saw for myself that they alone didn't relieve my ills I sought out further help. Again, we only see what we're ready to see.
You're doing a great job as a concerned sister and I'm sure you'll continue to be there for her in whatever way you can. Just please be sure to take care of yourself in the process. Caring for someone who is in the state your sister is in is emotionally and physically draining. Be gentle with yourself.
tall penguin
tall penguin
JoinedPosts by tall penguin
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17
My Witness sister is going insane and falling into depression
by free2beme inas i grew up, my sister was always a pretty strong person.
when she was 21 she got baptized after she married a worldly man, and they have been married 17 years.
he never went into the religion, and never even attended one meeting and has told me that he never will.
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tall penguin
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Gillet vs Watchtower!
by Atlantis inwatchtower bible & tract society of pennsylvania, inc., watchtower bible & tract society of new york, inc., watchtower bible & tract society of florida, inc., the west north miami congregation of jehovah's witnesses, inc., francois jn denis and maria nunes, .
in the district court of appeal of florida .
gillet v. watchtower bible & tract society case no.
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tall penguin
So, what was the outcome of this case? Or is it still in the courts?
My favourite part has to be this:
"Second, there is no evidence that Nunes was acting as an agent for any church defendant when she got into her car to go to the place where she was to engage in religious activities. There is no evidence that any church defendant instructed, advised or in any manner controlled the means by which Nunes or any other congregant was to get to the place where they were to proselytize.
There also is no evidence that any church defendant knew that Nunes was going to drive her own car as opposed to walking, riding a bike, taking a cab, riding with someone else, or, if available, taking public transportation. There certainly is no evidence that any church defendant asked Nunes to drive her car or attempted to control Nunes’ transportation in any manner by providing a vehicle, fuel, insurance, or by checking Nunes’ driving record or determining whether she had a valid driver’s license. Rather, the record shows that after the meeting at the Gillet home, each congregant was making his or her own way to the place where he or she was going to engage in a religious activity.
In sum, on this record, no agency relationship has been demonstrated."
Ahh...legalese at its best. Nothing like absolution by technicalities.
tall penguin -
25
So, Who is Enjoying a White Chirstmas Today?
by JH in.
we always have a white christmas here up north.
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tall penguin
I was going to write earlier about how it's green and gray here in Toronto, Canada. It's been raining since yesterday and all the snow melted. But in the last hour, it's started snowing. The largest snowflakes I've ever seen in my life! The ground is covered and it looks beautiful here now.
All the best to you and yours!
tall penguin -
39
Do you feel that Jehovah drew you away from Jehovah's Witnesses?
by Scatteredsheep ini just joined this forum and while reading old entries came across the following question from may/05: "do you miss feeling that jehovah was listening to your prayers?
" that question and the responses gave me the courage to ask the above question.
about 3 years ago, 5 publishers, including me, were disfellowshipped after jehovah led us to speak up to our elders regarding their inconsiderate treatment of victims who came to them for help.
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tall penguin
Interesting question Scatteredsheep. Welcome to the board.
In some ways I've always felt a certain presence watching over me in my life. As difficult as my life has been, there have been some rather providential and serendipitous happenings along the way. While I'm not prepared to attribute these to Jehovah or any specific god I do believe that there is an energetic presence in this universe that restores balance to those who are connected with it.
I've spent much time in the past decade creating space for that balance in my life and I do believe that when I was ready for it, that energetic presence provided the strength, support, situations and information I needed to see "the truth" for what it really was. When I disassociated this past August I knew beyond a doubt that the universe was in full support of my decision to leave the jw. It was as if the heavens were singing!
:) tall penguin -
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tall penguin
This kid's got a future in writing!
He's in the wrong religion. If he were a jw he'd have the pick of the litter. All those sisters desperate for lovin'. He'd have no problem having his 'faith adequately proven before the Lord.'
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21
Just watched LOTR!
by tall penguin inbelieve it or not, i just saw lotr for the first time this weekend.
being a good little dub, i thought it was "deemo" and refused to see it when it came out.
i finally got over myself and watched the first two movies this weekend and omg!
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tall penguin
So...maybe I will give the books a try. Perhaps they would be an easier read now that I've seen the movies.
hartstrings, as I mentionned, I'm not a fantasy fan myself but I loved these movies. The characters are all well-casted and well-developed and the story is epic. The cinematography is captivating. I don't know what else to say. It's one of those stories that just has you holding your breath waiting to see what comes next.
Regarding Narnia, I haven't read those books either but I just saw the movie. I wasn't nearly as impressed by it as I was with LOTR. I realize it's written for a different audience and so it has a different appeal. I did find it entertaining though. Lots of Christian undertones. More obviously so than LOTR. Hope you enjoy it.
tall penguin -
21
Just watched LOTR!
by tall penguin inbelieve it or not, i just saw lotr for the first time this weekend.
being a good little dub, i thought it was "deemo" and refused to see it when it came out.
i finally got over myself and watched the first two movies this weekend and omg!
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tall penguin
I'm not sure I'd be able to handle the books. I've never been one for reading fiction. I especially find fantasy difficult because of all the details--place names, different characters, lands, geography, etc. I can keep it together visually on screen, but unfortunately, I have a difficult time visualizing it and keeping it straight in my brain if I'm reading it.
I'll stick to the movies for now. I'm sooooo looking forward to watching the last one.
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Profile of the New Awake!
by Severus injw's now have the january awake!
in hand.
notice that there is no specific date, for the awake!
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tall penguin
Anybody else a little freaked out by the little boy's eyes on this awake cover? I mean, he looks like he's feelin' the effects of the kool aid in a big way, if ya know what I mean ;) It's rather disturbing.
tall penguin -
21
Just watched LOTR!
by tall penguin inbelieve it or not, i just saw lotr for the first time this weekend.
being a good little dub, i thought it was "deemo" and refused to see it when it came out.
i finally got over myself and watched the first two movies this weekend and omg!
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tall penguin
Believe it or not, I just saw LOTR for the first time this weekend. Being a good little dub, I thought it was "deemo" and refused to see it when it came out. I finally got over myself and watched the first two movies this weekend and OMG! It rocked! My brother and I stayed up late on Saturday to watch the first one then got up early on Sunday, had a lovely breakfast and watched the second one. We'll be getting together this weekend to finish off the trilogy. I can't wait!
tall penguin -
10
Give ideas for "Last minute Christmas gift buyers"
by JH in.
ok, how about giving original ideas to poeple who don't know what to buy as christmas gift to their loved ones.
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tall penguin
Have any friends with kids who barely get out of the house to do something fun? Buy them a gift certificate for a local restaurant or movie theatre along with a little note offering your services as a babysitter for the evening. And for the kids, give them a DVD or game that they like that you promise to come and enjoy with them on the night that you babysit them.
I also think that gift certificates for a massage or facial are great gifts. Who doesn't like to be pampered? I used to work next to a spa and I know that even the guys loved to receive these gift certificates.
tall penguin